Break your chains.

There's something I've been wanting to write about for a few weeks but until now I haven't been able to find the words...


Addiction. Not many people understand it, or what it really means. Usually you do not know the full effects that addiction can have on family, spirituality, or even the addict themselves unless you have witnessed it or struggle with it personally.

What is addiction? Addiction is "the state of being enslaved to a habit or practice or to something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming, as narcotics, to such an extent that its cessation causes severe trauma." Addiction doesn't always refer to drugs or alcohol. For example, someone can be addicted to sex. I am mostly addressing alcoholism and drug addiction though.

Addiction has many sides and many points of views. I cannot speak for an addict, but I can speak for someone who has grown up around one for most of their life. One of the hardest things to understand is where addiction comes from. At first you want to blame the addict for their actions. The fact that they love their drug or Bud more than they love you as a human being is infuriating. Quite frankly, that feeling sucks. But you have to understand that addiction is not just a lack of will power or morals. It's been proven that addiction is hereditary. Lol and my family proves this study. You cannot blame someone for their genetics. Then again, each individual is given a choice on how to deal with the cards they are given.

Even if someone gives up their battle to addiction and becomes its victim, it is your choice on how to react. You can get mad, be upset, throw a fit, or cry all you want, but ultimately an addict is still an addict until they choose otherwise. One of the hardest things about loving an addict is that you always want to blame yourself or question why you are not good enough to keep them sober. Something you need to accept is that it is not your fault. You did nothing to make them that way. Also, even if they blame you for their drinking or drug addiction, it is not your fault either. You are not forcing them to drink, nor are you forcing them to do drugs. Quit putting the blame on yourself or accepting the blame you are given.

How do you accept an addict for who they are then? You love them. That is all you can do. You can tell them that you are there for them. You can pray for them. Do not get angry at them. Fighting with an addict is pointless. Honestly, they probably won't even remember what happened when tomorrow comes around. Have compassion for them. Do not condemn them for their actions, because being angry and blaming people solves nothing. You should have compassion for an addict because of their internal struggles. They often feel remorse about their addiction and they turn to the substance as a way to deal with it. In all reality it just feeds the cycle and makes it worse.

If you are an addict yourself and you know this, then you can change if you want to. There is always hope. You just have to believe in yourself and realize that you are worth something. You have to realize that the change is worth it once you surmount your addiction. It isn't something you can do for other people. You have to do it for yourself. It isn't easy and it takes effort and time and energy. It's going to be painful but in the end you will be so much happier. You need help if you want to do this. Most likely you cannot do it on your own. There are people who want to help you but you have to be willing to help yourself first. Aren't you tired of being a slave to your own habits? Free yourself, because you have the power to do so.

^"No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it."  1 Corinthians 10:13 

Fork in the Road

Decisions. You make them often. Some are harder than others. Yet some decisions you make seem like a giant fork in the road without a sign telling you what lies on the path ahead. How do you know if something is right for you? Sometimes you delude yourself into thinking that something is good for you, when really it isn't. OR maybe it just isn't what God has intended for you. No matter what you think is right for you, He knows better.

I've learned this from experience. At the time something seems so right, yet later you come to realize it was so wrong.  Right now I'm having this problem with college. I got accepted to Southeastern University with half of everything paid in scholarships. I already paid the enrollment fee and chose which dorm I prefer bunking in. It sounds all very nice and dandy. The problem? It's three hours away from home, away from comfort and everyone I love. I was willing to go away for college because I thought it would be best for me to be independent and on my own for awhile.

The other day in class when someone brought up Southeastern I got a bad feeling in my stomach. They pointed out that realistically I would only come home once in awhile. That's not how I thought it would be. So I prayed about it. Not only did I feel better, but I came up with an alternative. Why not just study at Palm Beach Atlantic, where I won't have to pay room and board? I have an appointment to talk with an admissions counselor. Hope it goes well!

Everyone has had that one hard decision to make. It may be deciding to break off an unhealthy relationship, accepting an addict for who they are regardless of their disease, choosing to give up something detrimental to you, or even realizing that you aren't alone and that people care about you. Choices can be hard to make on your own. It can especially be hard to make a decision if you don't know which direction is the right way to go. Isn't it a relief to know that you don't have to make these choices on your own?

The point of this is that no matter what situation, no matter how small or big, God is ALWAYS in control. If you ask him for help, He will help you. Even if you get a no, then there's a special reason why. There is something better waiting down the road. Until you reach that something, you won't understand why God is saying no. So don't get frustrated right away. Keep on praying, and be persistent. You'll come across your answers sooner than you think. And when you do, it will be better than you ever imagined.

Blemished.

This insomniac heart finds no rest,
   nor will it know peace
until your presence is shown.
  Your light, and yours alone
may illuminate this incessant darkness.
 
This spirit has been crushed
   from its own ceaseless wandering.
A drought has begun
  because these rivers have run dry,
     allowing destitution.
Nothing can replenish them,
  not anything on earth.
No well runs deep enough,
   nor is any pure enough
to cleanse this blemished intertior.

Only your water, oh Lord,
  may slake my thirst.
All of my being: flesh, heart, and soul:
  yearn for your touch.
Pick me up, rescue me from despair,
  and cradle me in your safe arms.
Do not let me fall victim to my afflictions,
  or be overcome by the storms raging within.
Forgive my follies,
  vindicate me from my vices.
Instill your will and virtues on my heart,
  where they may never be erased.

Breaking Words That Bind You.

What is a promise? It is defined as "to give an assurance of (something to someone); undertake (to do something) in the future:". Why are they so significant? Why is it so painful when they are broken?

From a biblical perspective, a promise is something to be fulfilled and carried out. This is seen in God's promise to never flood the earth again. The fulfillment of the old testament by sending Jesus to be crucified on Calvary. The promise that you can be reborn and have a fresh start with everything forgiven. And promises that are waiting to be fulfilled, such as the second coming of Christ. The point though is that God keeps His promises no matter what.

Numbers 23:19 "God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill?"

Think about times people have broken promises to you. It didn't make you feel very warm and fuzzy, did it? In fact, it may have made you feel angry, unloved, or unimportant. Every single person is guilty of breaking a promise. It doesn't matter how small of a promise it is. If you give someone your word, they should be able to trust that your actions will match your words. Don't make a promise you can't keep because you are bound to break the words that bind you.

"I will not violate my covenant or alter what my lips have uttered." Psalm 89:34

If you ever make a promise to God, try and remember how He keeps the promises made to you. So why should you break the ones you make with Him? Think of how it felt to have someone you love break a promise to you. I bet it hurt extremely bad. Do you think it hurts God any less? If anything it hurts Him more. Know that God will never break His promises to you even though other people have broken their promises.

Isaiah 54:10 "Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed," says the LORD, who has compassion on you."

Forsaken?

Lord, hear my cry.
     If you forsake me
I will surely die
     Before the sun does rise.
Dry my tears.
     Whisper words of love
To relinquish my fears
     Of the nightmares past,
The tormenting present,
     The foggy future.
This cloud of uncertainty - constant,
     Never dwindling, never ceasing.
This body bestowed upon me,
     By troubles of the earthly realm
Has succumbed to being weary.
   

Little Monkey

As a little girl I loved adventure. One of my favorite things I used to do was climb trees. In essence, I was a little monkey. I would fearlessly climb as high as I could. My feet never lost their holdings and my hands always found a branch or a root to cling on. One day I was merrily climbing a tree. It was nice and sunny outside. Just another ordinary day. Wrong. This time I got stuck and couldn't get out of the tree. This was the time before eight-year- olds had cell phones, so I couldn'y just call my dad. I panicked because I felt alone and no one was there to help me. I screamed for my dad and he heard my cry. He came to the tree I was climbing. I got down on the lowest branch I could reach. My dad held his arms out. I jumped and he caught me. My father came to my rescue.

How often does our Heavenly Father come to our rescue when we call Him? So much more. He helps me keep my sanity and makes me feel like I'm never alone. All you have to do is ask.

⁹ “So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. ¹⁰ For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened."
Luke 11: 9-10

Think of how independent you try and be. Think of how you try to deal with everything on your own instead of praying to God about it. As christians we do this more than we realize. I know I do. If we are having trouble with school, relationships, work, our self-esteem, whatever it is, why do we wait until we start sinking in quick sand before we go to God? Sometimes we feel like He's not listening if we don't get the answer we want to hear. Then we quit praying and become stubborn. It doesn't have to be that way. God isn't a genie. He doesn't grant you all of your wishes in the snap of a finger. That doesn't mean you shouldn't pray to Him. He helps you if you allow Him to. He wants to help you. Just search your heart. If it's been awhile since you've talked to God, know that it's never to late to call for help. Do YOU want Him to help you, or do you want to try and do everything on your own again?

L'amour Inconditionnel.

I've been thinking a lot lately. I have a lot of feelings that words cannot convey.

Think about all of the relationships you've had in your life. Some are healthy, and some aren't. I think every person has, or will have, that one person who hurts them more than anyone else. Sometimes we love people even though we have no reason to. Loving that certain human being goes against all logic and reasoning. Yet you love them anyways. You love someone who tore your life apart. Love someone who takes advantage of you and manipulates you without feeling remorse. Love someone who doesn't love you back. Why do we torture ourselves for people who don't appreciate it? for people who wouldn't do the same? There can only be one answer: UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.

What is this so called unconditional love? Many people say this without fully comprehending the meaning or weight of these words. This means that no matter what someone says or does to you, your feelings will not be swayed and you love them just the same. You will always forgive them for their follies and wrong doings. Unconditional love is the way that God loves YOU.

What does it mean that God loves you unconditionally? No matter what you do, how much you sin, how much you turn away, He will love you just the same.

The Bible tells you to love everyone as you love yourself.

"The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these." 
- Mark 12: 31

Without God, this is humanely impossible. Why? Because God is love.

"Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love." 1 John 4: 8 

Love comes from God. He wants you to love others as He has loved you. This means you have to love others unconditionally, and you cannot do this without God.

   ^34\ “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. ³⁵ By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." John 13: 34-35

I've seen people love unconditionally. Honestly, at first it seems irrational. Why forgive someone for hurting you over and over? What's the point in that? Shouldn't you know better than to keep making yourself vulnerable again and again? No, you shouldn't know better. Just because you love someone unconditionally does not make you weak, stupid, or mean you love blindly. It means you're a strong person who can love others the way that God loves you. It means you can find it in your heart to forgive others despite the fact that they may never change or be sorry for what they did. It means you can sleep at night with a light heart.

Have you ever had someone that you find it hard to love unconditionally? Personally, I have. It's someone I used to be very close with, and their actions have made it difficult to even think about them without wanting to vomit. Over time I was able to forgive them. At first it seems impossible. Believe it or not, it gets easier the more you try. It takes effort and willingness. I will never expect them to change, but I love them regardless of what they say or do. This is the meaning of unconditional love.